


All My Fragile Strength

by HYPERFocused



Category: Smallville
Genre: Fortress of Solitude, Healing, Inspired by Music, Kryptonians invaded Earth, M/M, Metropolis, Piano, Secrets
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-26
Updated: 2017-01-26
Packaged: 2018-09-20 03:29:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,385
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9473426
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HYPERFocused/pseuds/HYPERFocused
Summary: For:NuannanRequestClark is entranced hearing Lex play the piano.Summary:Lex can’t sleep alone. Clark helps from afar.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Title from Gravity, by Sara Barielles, thanks for the song suggestion!  
>  **Gifter's Note:** First off, I'm so sorry for the very long delay, and hope you enjoy this anyway. I loved the Lex paints Superman pic, but this was the prompt that called me.

There's this now elusive thing called sleep. Lex lay awake, unable to tune out the sounds of the city below him, or turn down his worried mind. He once regularly got a handful of decent hours each night. Now it's more like four, tops, and they're probably not connected. Part of the problem was that he was unexpectedly alone, which besides making him lonely, also meant he was cold. 

The fact was, Lex didn't sleep so well by himself anymore. At least not without some serious chemical help, which was an indulgence he considered part of his past. He hadn't taken anything stronger than your average cliche 1950s housewife did since late in Clark's freshman year at Met U.

Cold should have been nothing new. There had been years in which Lex had been sure he must somehow have been born cold-blooded, or at least that the meteor shower had shocked the warmth from him, just as it had taken his hair. 

Smallville. So aptly named, Lex still remembered how small and afraid he had felt as he accompanied his father in the LuthorCorp helicopter. How Lionel forced him to watch the ground growing closer. Intellectually, Lex knew he was safe. The pilot was one of the best. His father would demand nothing less. 

Still, Lex couldn't shake the feeling of dread that hit him that day. It didn't even dissipate once they'd landed, and he wandered off, bored with the negotiations, to look around while his father took care of business. It would be the last time his father would regard him with anything resembling real affection. The last time he didn't look at Lex like Lex was a freak. It would also be the last time Lex didn't hate him.

Afterward, he felt like a bug under his father's shoe. Lionel would have agreed with the assessment, as if somehow Lex had been responsible for his own condition. He wouldn't coddle Lex. That was fine. Lex didn't want to be babied. But his father refused to acknowledge that Lex had even been through any sort of ordeal. 

It took exile to an ersatz castle, with a probably pilfered provenance, for him to meet the one person who would make Lex feel human again.The irony that it was someone truly out of this world, whose arrival was unknowingly the cause of Lex's hair loss, was not lost on Lex. 

Lex was loath to admit it, but he was lost without Clark. Not professionally, of course. LexCorp’s sphere of influence was growing at an extraordinary pace, the researchers innovations greatly furthering human progress, potential and company profits. His political inroads were, too. But Lex didn't just live for his work anymore. Just coming home to his own space no longer held whatever appeal it once did.

Clark’s presence was what made it home.There was nothing like having your own, very personal, super-powered space heater. That said space-heater was the warmest-hearted person Lex had ever known, not to mention the hottest, was all part of the amazing package. And yes, he did have an amazing package. Screw not mentioning it. Lex just wished it was home, so he could unwrap it.

Lex would never forget the day Clark finally, officially moved in. He had returned from an emergency trip to Tokyo to find Clark sleeping soundly in his bed, rumpled and adorable, and so angelic there was nothing Lex wanted to do to him more than debauch him, to put them on at least somewhat of an even keel. 

Clark’s presence wasn't completely unexpected. Lex's door was always open. (Well, every door was open to Clark, but Lex had spelled it out explicitly). Sure, Clark spent a lot of time at Lex's. The invitation was always there, but it had taken a while before Clark had brought over his duffel bags and set up shop at the penthouse. Actually, what it had taken was a shitty roommate whose proverbial tie was always on the door, but rarely around his neck. His girlfriend was the one clinging to him, limpet like.

If Lex, perhaps (not that he'd admit it) had encouraged the guy’s immature behavior ( _Lex_ wouldn't call it bribery), it was only because Clark had turned down Lex's invitation to move into the penthouse. Technically, yes, he was expected to live in the dorms Freshman year, but there were few rules Lex couldn't buy his way out of. Lex figured a semester was long enough for Clark to get that real college feel. 

He might have been a bit less selfish (“Luthorian”, Clark's father would have said. Lex could hardly believe he actually missed the man, but he did.) if Pete had ended up at Met U as well, but he didn't. Clark was assigned what he thought was the typical “matched by some unknown algorithm” roommate. Lex didn't let on that the algorithm had been tweaked a bit for even less compatible matching. Not that Lex wanted to cause Clark any stress, but when the solution was so easy...

Clark, being the Boy Scout that he was, (without having ever actually been a Boy Scout) of course tried his best to be good roommate material, but finally had to throw in the towel in favor of less crowded and noisy surroundings. It wasn't until later that he'd filled Lex in completely.

Lex would never forget that conversation. “So, what, ‘Randy Andy’ finally got to be too much for you?” 

“You could say that. He goes by Drew, though.” Lex knew that. He'd written Andrew Ryan Randall on his check.

“Forgive me, Clark. I promise I won't misstate your former roommate’s name, on the minuscule chance I ever have call to mention it again.”

“OK, that's better. Ass.” Clark pulled back the covers.

“You are staying, right? I mean from the amount of baggage I would assume so.” Lex climbed into his nicely warned bed.

“Yes, I want to stay. I've always wanted to stay”, Clark had told him. “But if we're going to do this, you've got to know something, Lex, you have to know the truth. I have to trust you with all my heart, and that means all my secrets.” He had that intent, serious expression that he only got when he was worried about someone's welfare.

“You can tell me anything. I love you. I swear on my mother's grave that you can trust me, and I will never give you reason to doubt that.” It was true. Lex took Clark's hand.

Lex was quite certain he knew what Clark was going to tell him. It was probably the reason he had taken so long to agree to move in with Lex in the first place. Clark couldn't hide his abilities or lie worth a damn when he _wasn't_ living with Lex, he certainly couldn't keep up the pretense now. Frankly, Lex would have been disgusted if he tried.

“OK, first of all, I want you to know I'm sorry. I'm sorry I ever had to lie to you, and I'm even more sorry that everything bad that happened to you and everyone else in Smallville is my fault.”

“Nobody forced you to lie on my account.” As soon as he said it, he knew it wasn't true. It was probably exactly what happened. "You didn't do it very convincingly anyway. But what do you mean everything is your fault? How is that even possible??” It wasn't. 

“Your hair. Everyone with weird abilities who've tried to hurt you, or worse. Lana's parents. It's all on me. Every rotten thing that happened since the meteors fell is all because my parents, my real parents, wouldn't accept fate.”

That was four years ago. Since then, they had been through so much together, most of it good, but there were some things they had helped each other through. They had both lost their fathers, though Jonathan was the only one worth mourning. No one was lamenting the loss of Lionel Luthor. Lex was unmoved by the man, but did grieve the loss of the good father he'd never had or have.

Clark had grown into his powers, and would likely continue to do so as new ones developed. Lex was proud but not surprised at the man, the superman, Clark had become. He would have been that with or without his Gifts. Clark's decency and integrity were equally miraculous.

Lex certainly didn't begrudge Metropolis (or the world) their hero in the silly cape, but he wished they didn't rely on him so much. 

The huddled masses never asked for any of the other Superheroes. The lesser ones, who could easily take up some of these cases,if truth be told. Lex was all about the truth. Lex referred to them as the muddled hassles, when he was frustrated enough. That term got Lex a short, guilty, adorable snort-laugh in response, followed by a schooled, disappointed look, Clark probably learned at his mother's knee.

It was true, though. It was _always_ Superman they thought of first. His name they called out for in the middle of the night, just when by all rights Lex should have been the one yelling out Clark's name, or God’s, or maybe both. Clark definitely had some God-like qualities.

And once he'd been summoned, up, up and away Clark, went. He never thought,“Hey, this would be right up your alley, Wally/Bruce/Diana”, or even “Isn't this what 911 is for.” Or as he told Lex, apologizing for another disappearance, “I do think that, eventually. But by that time I'm already on the scene. it's kind of instinctive.” 

-Lex understood that, being over scheduled himself.

He imagined Perry White, and everyone at The Daily Planet, felt similarly. Clark seemed to get the least important assignments, both to avoid conflicts of interest regarding his relationship with Lex, and because Clark tended to disappear when things got sticky anyway, though Superman was bound to show up. Clark put across this ridiculous, dorky persona, and Lex wondered how anyone bought it.

That neither Perry, nor _Lois_ supposed star reporter and Clark's (working) partner had figured out the whole secret identity thing, caused Lex to question their journalistic powers of observation. Lois especially. Her interest in Superman was much more prurient than investigative, even Lex had caught her checking out what was under the Super-suit, while ignoring her equally attributed partner. This obtuseness may have been why she never put two and two together.

Lex had no problem with Lois not ogling his boyfriend. Partner? Fiancé? Lex would probably have to ask about that last one. He knew that in another life, Clark could have fallen in love with her. It made Lex a happy and grateful for the life he had.

* * *

Clark's surroundings at the moment had a lot to do with the sense of cold Lex was feeling, even if Lex didn't know it. A long and arduous battle with what Wally had nicknamed a Y.A.N.K (Yet Another Nasty Kryptonian) who Kal El had barely managed to drag to The Phantom Zone had zapped his energy. He needed to recharge.

He needed his Fortress of Solitude. The real one. As much as he longed to just zip home and into his and Lex’s warm bed, he knew he couldn't. He needed to get his energy back, which could take a few days, and he needed to talk to Jor El. 

Yet again, he was less than forthcoming about just how many other Kryptonians were out there, potentially causing trouble for the people and planet Clark had sworn to protect. Clark may have been the last son of Krypton, but sometimes it felt like he had run into enough other ones to people a family reunion.

Clark couldn't leave the Fortress, but he could still watch Lex and see how he was doing, even if he couldn't go to him quite yet. He was distressed to see how little Lex was sleeping. It was like he didn't even try. He would work himself into exhaustion, and still only manage a few hours, at best. Sometimes it would be at his computer, the cold blue light from the screen showing the circles under Lex’s eyes. Sometimes his laptop, where Clark hoped Lex might nod off for the night. Most recently, it was at the piano. Clark didn't realize Lex could play so beautifully, but he did. Lex did everything beautifully, Clark thought.

As soon as he knew he was back to his usual self, Clark sped home to Lex. Lex was playing a beautiful, haunting melody on the baby grand. Clark could almost recognize it, it sounded so familiar. 

“You're home. Good. I hate it when you're gone that long. I can't help worrying about you.”

“I'm fine, now. I just needed some time at the fortress. It was a pretty difficult battle. Someone was supposed to tell you what was going on. Didn't any of them…”:

“Yes, thank God. But somehow, Wally's ‘Supe's in stasis in the snow,’ wasn't all that helpful.”

“Oh, geez. I can see how that might not be. Is that why you haven't been sleeping?”

“How did you know that?”

“I can see and hear pretty well, you know.”

“Yes, Superman. I was aware of that, “ Lex said, archly. “So did you catch me doing anything interesting?” 

“I did, in fact.” Clark had just figured it out. “It took me awhile, because it had been forever since I last heard it, but do you know what you we're just playing?”

“Do you? I don't. I'm sure it's just something I picked up somewhere. My mother used to play soft piano music to help me sleep.”

“No, Lex, _my_ mother played it for _me_. My birth mother. It's a Kryptonian lullaby.” Clark couldn't quite remember it from when he was an infant, still on Metropolis, but he did recall it being played on his ship.

“Clark, that's amazing. Sounds like we've got a psychic bond or something.” 

“Oh, we are definitely bonded. But not just psychically, now that I'm home, I hope.” 

“I couldn't agree more,” Lex said. “Screw the Justice League”, he groused to Clark, pulling him down to the bed with a relieved sigh. “It's long past time for the ‘Just Us’ league.” 


End file.
